How should I pray for my adult children?

We as parents love our children and want what is best for them.  We want them to have a relationship with God.  We want them to be successful and financially stable adults.  Do you pray for your adult children, but never seem to see any results?  Are you wasting your time?  Are you praying for the wrong things?  How and what should you pray for? 

Recently my small group Bible study  has been reading and studying the book "The Power of Praying For Your Adult Children" by Stormie Omartian.  And what great insights she has on praying for our adult children.  We begin praying for our kids when they are young, but as they get older we really don't know how or what to pray for.  She tells us just what we need to know.  This post is taken from her book with some of my thoughts added.  I hope you will enjoy this and get some ideas of how you should be praying.  - And I highly recommend you get the book.

Seven things every parent needs to know:

1. Being a parent never stops, if you really care about your child's well-being.  When they become adults, they make decisions and choices on their own.  We as parents want to express our concerns and give advice, but may not have an opening to do so or our advice is not wanted or accepted.  We can go to God with our concerns and ask Him to do something on behalf of our adult children.  If we trust that God hears and answers our prayers,  it can change their lives.

2. We need to know that we can't fix our adult children.  Only God can make changes in them.  Our job is to release them into God's hands and keep praying for them.

3. We need to know that God can change everything.  It's hard to know what to do and what not to do for them.  Only God can give you wisdom about these things.  Prayer is not telling God what to do, but it's partnering with Him for His will to be done.  We must believe that God loves you and your adult children and He will hear your prayers.  Believe He can deliver you from fears and give you and your adult children what you need when you ask for it.  No matter how big your adult children's problems are, God is greater.  Believe that your prayers have power.

4. We need to know we must stop blaming ourselves.  Don't feel guilty of how good or not so good you have raised them.  We are not perfect.  God is the perfect parent and looked what happened to His children.  We need to walk with God daily and ask Him for wisdom about everything.  You can ask Him to free you from any guilt.  Don't be discouraged.  Discouragement is a sign you need to spend more time with God so He can encourage you.

5. We need to know we have to forgive.  Forgiveness has to flow in us before the power of the Holy Spirit flows through us when we pray.  "If I regard iniquity in my heart, the Lord will not hear." - Psalm 66:18.  So forgive your adult children for anything they may have done to hurt or disappoint you.

6.  We need to know there is only one perfect parent.  That is God Himself.  There are no perfect parents on earth.  "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it." - Proverbs 22:6.  If you didn't know the Lord when your children were young and didn't train them in His ways, it's not too late.  You can still go to God and confess and ask for forgiveness for your mistakes.  Ask Him to now show you how to pray for your adult children.

7. We need to know you can say "For this adult child I prayed".  These words were spoken by Hannah in 1 Sam. 1:27.  Her prayer is one of the greatest examples of a parents prayer.  If you have not dedicated your child to the Lord, do it now and release him to God's hands.

Start now praying for your adult children.

Lord,

I pray you would teach me how to pray for my children.  Set me free from all worry and concern and give me peace.  I now release them to you.  Thank you for loving me and my children.  Help me not to feel guilty for things I have done or not done in their lives.  Help me to forgive myself and anyone who has hurt my children.  Thank you for hearing my prayers.  Give me faith to believe and patience to wait for the answers.  I give you all the praise and the glory.  In Jesus' name I pray. 

Amen.

Now that you have released and dedicated or rededicated your adult children into the hands of God, here are a few things you can pray for:

Pray that they will welcome an outpouring of the Holy Spirit.

Pray that they will be influenced by the Holy Spirit of truth.

Pray for their hearts will be turned toward the Lord and open to receive Him.

Pray that they have a desire to know God better and become more like Him.

Pray that their heart will be closed to the lies of the enemy and open to God's truth.

Pray that they have the desire to have a repentant heart and know what God has done..

Pray that God will give them wisdom, discernment and revelation.

Pray that they have freedom in Christ, deliverance and restoration.

Pray that they understand God's purpose for their lives.

Pray that they work successfully and have financial stability.

Pray that they have a sound mind and the right attitude.

Pray that they resist evil influences and destructive behavior.

Pray that they avoid all sexual pollution and temptation.

Pray that they experience good health and God's healing.

Pray that they enjoy a successful marriage and raise godly children.

Pray that they maintain strong and fulfilling relationships.

Pray that they walk into the future God has for them.

 Her book goes in more detail giving examples of prayers on each of the above suggestions on things to pray.  She lists many, many Scriptures concerning how, what, and why we should pray for our children.  Never give up praying for them.  God wants them to come to Him and be happy more than we do.  If you don't see results, don't be discouraged.  We must remain faithful and trust God.  We must wait on His timing.

 

Ephesians 6:10-24

Ephesians 6:10-13 – The Battle

“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power.” – (Eph. 6:10).  How do we do that?  We should trust Him in all things and believe in what He says.  Paul tells us to put on the full Armor of God so when evil comes, we will be able to stand our ground and not be deceived.  We should also study His Word, pray, give Him control and be united with fellow sisters and brothers.

The devil is very crafty and a master of deception.  He is the ruler of the world, the father of lies, a deceiver and a murderer.  He is the enemy!  He’s out to get us on his side and away from God.  We need to be aware and be on-guard so we won’t give in to his deceptions.  He is very good at what he does.  In Gen. 3 he caused Eve to doubt and question God.  In 2 Sam. 11 he distracted David by staying home from battle and when he did, Satan caused him to lust.  In Dan. 4 Satan caused the king to be prideful and praised himself instead of God.  In Matt. 4 he tempted Jesus even using God’s own words.  We should not underestimate the devil.   He’s working very hard to snare people, because he knows he’s running out of time and he knows God will win the ultimate battle.

When we first believed, Jesus came to live inside us and now we are a target for the enemy of God, but Satan was defeated at the cross.  He hates us, because we are Christians.  He schemes for believers and is set to destroy.  There is a battle going on for those who belong to Jesus.  He even tempted Jesus.  God allows him to roam the earth with his demons.  God promises to fully equip us with His presence and resources.  The more we know God and recognize Satan’s work the more we understand Satan schemes. 

Satan has many schemes.  He can cause us to doubt God and His trustworthiness.  He brings false teachings.  If the teaching is slightly truthful, then we think it must be OK.  He makes it hard to live as a Christian.  He hinders the work of the ministry of Jesus working against our efforts for God.  He wants you to live the way the world does with its pleasures, hypocrisies and being independent of God.  He discourages us when we are lonely, have free time, facing death, etc.

Do you doubt God’s love?

Has He asked you to serve, but you say you don’t have time?

Ephesians 6:13-17 – The Battle Armor

Should we fear Satan?  No.  God has given us the full Armor of God for our defense as a weapons against him.  If we use these weapons, he cannot harm us.  These weapons are:

Belt of Truth – Know God’s true Word so you won’t be deceived.  The truth holds us up in battle.

Breastplate of Righteousness – When we receive salvation, we receive the righteousness of God.  It protects us.  None of us are righteous on our own.  We should live and reflect His righteousness.  Right living is a protection for your heart.     

Feet fitted with Readiness – By knowing the Word you can be ready when Satan attacks.  Be ready and willing to share the good news with others.

Shield of Faith – Faith is our trust in God.  Our shield is as big as our trust in God.  If we have faith, we are protected from Satan’s flaming arrows.  How big is your shield?  Do you find your faith is protecting you?

Helmet of Salvation – The enemy wants to destroy your salvation.  Salvation is our hope.  He wants to attack our hope and our mind.  The helmet is the security of our mind. 

Sword of the Spirit – This is the an offensive weapon, God’s Word.  Satan cannot win against God's Holy Word.  Stab those threats with the Word of God! 

Why is the Word of God so powerful?  It’s the revelation of God.  It assures us a win.

Why does the enemy work so hard?  He doesn’t want us to know and believe in the power of God.  He knows he only has a short time before his ultimate defeat.

How can you apply God’s Armor?  Believe, put your faith and trust in Jesus, know His Word, stay in His Word, listen and obey the Holy Spirit, stand firm and don’t be deceived, pray for strength and guidance, pray in all circumstances, pray for others and don’t let Satan get a foothold.  “Submit yourselves, then to God.  Resist the devil and he will flee from you.” – (James 4:7)

Have you accepted the Lord Jesus Christ as Savior?

If you are a Christian, where is your soft spot?  Is it fear, anger, control, being all things to all people?

How are you going to draw on the protection of His Armor?

Is your Belt unbuckled?

Are you living with peace in God?

Who is robbing you of your peace?

Ephesians 6:18-24 – The Battle of Prayer and Platoon

Prayer is the key.  We are to be good soldiers for God.  He is the Commander-in-Chief.  We need to be in prayer.  He saved us because He wants to fellowship with us.  That’s prayer.

“And pray in the Spirit an all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests.  With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.” – (Eph. 6:18).  How can you pray for someone, if you don’t know them?  We need to be alert to the needs of others so we will know what to pray for.  We also need to be alert to what’s going on around us in the world to pray more effectively.

Paul asks the Ephesians to pray that God would give him the words to speak the gospel and that he speak with boldness and without fear.  We should pray for the same things.  It is very important that we pray!  We can be a witness and plant the seed.  It is the Holy Spirit who convicts.  We need to let God to do His work.  We should pray this for ourselves and other believers.  When we pray, it also changes us making us closer to God and more compassionate toward others.

How willing are you to ask for prayer from others?

How trust worthy are you as you pray for them?

What hinders your prayer life?

Have you prayed and prayed for something and it seems that God is not answering?  Don’t stop praying.  Eph. 6:18 says to keep on praying.  There is no out.  The enemy says, “Well you tried so move on.”  Pray and trust the will of God.  It’s up to God not you.  Don’t give up on your prayer.

Principles:

Believers are never alone in the battle of life.

Believers are fully equipped in Christ to stand firm in the battle of life.

Living in a constant dialogue with God gives perspective and power for the battle of life.